Crazy messy life...

I have such a crazy, messy life. One day I can have most of my things in order- bills paid on time, laundry caught up, living room straightened up, etc... I am not too bad at this being a mom thing! I have finally gotten the hang of this...I think... But the next day, though, I come home to find total disorder. Shoes in every room, dishes stacked up in the kitchen sink, and a past due notice from some forgotten debtor. I then begin to feel that I must be a failure... Why would I have ever though that I was getting better at this assignment God has given me? I obviously stink at it! Tonight was a good example of this.

Worked from home yesterday. I did cook supper and had a lot of dishes (and I mean A LOT) left from this event. I had open house last night at the school and therefore wasn't home. Also, a last minute trip to Walmart stole more of my evening. Up early this morning and out the door. I had hoped to be home by 5 pm, but a change in appointments moved that time to 7 pm. I got here and supper was ready(thanks Sissy!), but not much else had changed. Laundry still piled up... lots of dishes still dirty (Sissy did many of them, in her defense), and me without any energy. I just want to go to bed, if I was honest. I am tired, I am achy, and I am a little grumpy! I want to be better than this...I need to be better than this...

I want to get this all in order soon. I need to clean the house (again)...I need to do the laundry (again)... I need to get organized (for the first time!)...I need to feel like I am in control!
Now that I have written this, I immediately see the problem. I need to feel like I am in control??? I can't control my own appetite, much less my whole life!! I need to put God back in the driver seat. Would that mean that I would always come home to a clean house? No... Would this mean I would never get behind on laundry or dishes? No...Or that I would never forget to send in a payment? Oh no. BUT it might mean that I can keep these things in perspective. That I can relax a little bit and not worry so much about the little details. Maybe that I can worry more about being the person Christ wants me to be and less about the person the world tells me to be. I want to get this right. I really need to work on this... I will keep you posted on my progress.